Damn you Facebook!

Well, it's finally happened. Facebook Mobile has come to Canada. Not only must I be tormented by the constant urge to sign in and see just how (un)popular I am, but now I can have my phone announce exactly when there's the tiniest bit of activity in my little Facebook microcosm. And reply, from my cell. Because I'm just that important, that I need the ability to update my Facebook status while I'm eating lunch, lost in the woods, sleeping, and so on.

There are possibilities here though - Facebook contest for status update from the weirdest place? Hmm...That has promise.

poke

Everyone keeps poking me!!!

Granted, I bring it on myself. Someone started a global poke war against on of my friends, and I seized upon it with a vengeance. Poking people is fun.

But now, it's just getting ridiculous. Random guys that I made out with once at a wedding, that girl that I was tight with for about 2 weeks back in grade 6, people I'm not even sure I've ever met...

Fuck you Facebook! I'm covered in virtual bruises from all of this digital poking. I feel like the pixels are getting poked right off of me.

But I just can't help myself - I need to keep poking back. I WILL outpoke everyone!

I just have one thing to say about all of this:


Pokepokepoke
Poke…………….poke
Poke………………poke
Poke……………….poke
Poke………………poke
Poke……………..poke
Poke poke poke
Poke
Poke
Poke
Poke

……….Pokepoke
….Poke…………Poke
Poke……………….Poke
Poke……………….Poke
Poke……………….Poke
Poke……………….Poke
Poke……………….Poke
Poke……………….Poke
Poke……………….Poke
….Poke………….Poke
……….Pokepoke

Poke……………..Poke
Poke…………..Poke
Poke………. Poke
Poke…….Poke
Poke…Poke
Pokepoke
Poke…Poke
Poke……Poke
Poke………Poke
Poke………….Poke
Poke……………..Poke

Pokepokepokepokepoke
Pokepokepokepokepoke
Poke
Poke
Pokepokepoke
Pokepokepoke
Poke
Poke
Pokepokepokepokepoke
Pokepokepokepokepoke

Just when you think you finally escaped

Wow…even more people from highschool. As if Facebook isn’t bad enough for that shit. So I’m at this party. I see these two girls. I have a second of, “hey, they look kinda familiar’. This passes into, ‘well, I’m already half in the bag, of course they do’. The subject of said party mentions to me later that he knows I wrestled back in the day.

Well, yeah, how’d you know that?
Those girls told me.
Who the fuck are they?
They used to wrestle with you.

Well, no shit?!?

And indeed they did. And they recognize me, from that life many many moons ago. Fucking weird.

Another random thing…there were children crawling all around the bar. Who the fuck has their child’s birthday party at a bar? I mean really, should god forbid I ever spawn, I don’t even think that would ever occur to me. What is the world coming to?

So hell. Raise a glass, chug it down, and say cheers to yet another step towards the complete collapse of society as we know it.